WordType Designs
Driven To Distractions©
The Sound of One Hand Clapping©


A rchive Date
[ 10-09-2000 ]
Category
[ International Relations ]
sub-Categoy
[ U.N ]

      [Silly summit ties New York in knots
      By ERIC MARGOLIS
      Contributing Foreign Editor

      September 10, 2000

      NEW YORK -- "Get the f--- out of our way," screamed a Secret Service agent, as his monstrous black van, complete with whip antennas, blaring horn and flashing blue lights, ran my taxi off the road. The taxi driver swore back in pungent Bengali.

      A third-rate, Third World despot was rushing to the United Nations' World Millennium jamboree in midtown Manhattan. We mere peons had to make way for his six-car juggernaut - or else. In the last van, three big, crewcut security men, wearing their de rigeur sunglasses, earphones and secret code lapel pins, glared at us menacingly through an open window, fingering Uzi submachine guns.


      A large sign warned New Yorkers: "Do Not Use the East Side." As a native-born Manhattanite, I muttered, "Well, excuse me, world bigwigs, for getting in your sublime celestial path."


      Multiply this nasty little incident by 175, the number of VIP convoys racing through Manhattan's congested streets four or five times daily, throw in religious poobahs, a West Side conclave of 400 self-proclaimed great thinkers, 26,000 NYPD cops, Secret Service, State Department and UN security men - over twice the number of combat soldiers in Canada's army - 1,300 security and transport vehicles, countless TV crews from around the globe, and you have the nightmare of UN Millennium Week in New York.


      Scores of cross streets and major avenues were blocked off so foreign grandees could whiz along at 100 km/h, just like
      Leonid Brezhnev used to do through Moscow in his Chaika limo.

      Block just one intersection in Manhattan and the whole island goes into gridlock. That's why street drilling and utility work is done from midnight to 6 a.m., to the delight of local residents. Block 10% of Manhattan's streets, as was done last week, and traffic jams stretch to Boston.


      Mobs of angry protesters made things worse: Chinese
      Falun Gong cultists lost in weird trances; enraged Iranian Marxists; pro-peace and anti-peace Israelis insulting pro-peace and anti-peace American Jews; squabbling Arabs; Cuban exiles fuming at Fidel; Pakistani cab drivers turned political protesters; dejected Tibetans; bearded Kurds; ignored Kashmiris; Christian wannabe crusaders denouncing Sudan; beefy lesbian storm troopers; beer-bellied unionists; assorted anarchists and lots of befuddled tourists caught up in this international maelstrom.

      Lavish extravaganzas
      Meetings of world leaders have mushroomed in recent years from small, informal affairs into ostentatious, lavish and utterly empty made-for-TV extravaganzas. You're not a true world leader if you don't show up at every annual global gathering. That's something weary taxpayers everywhere should be protesting.

      A glitzy ad campaign assured New Yorkers the torture was all really worthwhile since the UN meeting of 245 international VIPs would solve poverty, war, disease, wife-beating, AIDS, dirty water, hunger, pollution, racism, sexism, homophobia, drugs abuse and just about every other scourge except for dreaded fat on hips and thighs (next year's agenda).


      The five-minute speech each world leader was allowed to give (old showmen Fidel Castro and
      Bill Clinton ran longer), cost New York taxpayers $10 million in police overtime and turned the city into bedlam, making life hell for anyone trying to get around town.

      Still, it was uplifting to see world leaders - who flew in on their personal jets, and roughed it in $10,000-per-night suites, attended by armies of fawning flunkies - actually take time off from urgent cocktail and dinner parties to orate about the plight of the world's poor, a billion of whom subsist on $1 a day. India's PM was even due to bring his own chef, since high-caste Hindus will not eat food touched by inferior castes.


      Only 20 aides
      Gen. Musharraf, who runs impoverished Pakistan, caused a stir by staying at an old, mid-price commercial hotel and bringing only 20 aides. What chutzpah. Was he trying to embarrass other leaders?

      Miscreant Americans felt the lash of
      Jean Chretien's tongue. Canada's socialist prime minister, whose government is $576 billion in debt, scourged the U.S. for being overdue in paying $1 billion in UN dues.

      My heart went out to presidents and dictators from dinky countries like Vanuatu, the Maldives, or Equatorial Guinea. They got no respect, no recognition, no hotel rooms, and no pix with Bill Clinton to show folks back home. Many had to bunk in their UN missions, or with poor relatives in the Bronx or Queens.


      After watching this week's egofest and windbaggery, I wanted to cry out, "Taxpayers of the world, unite! Throw off your chains! No imperial trappings for our elected officials."


      Why should democratic leaders travel like maharajas? How dare Bill Clinton block off half of New York so he can go visit the Metropolitan Museum, attended by a retinue worthy of
      Kubla Khan? Why whack taxpayers for the costs of this gigantic, phony and utterly pointless photo-op?

      Heads of state should set an example of thrift and respect for public money by flying economy class, standing in line, using public transport, and staying in modest hotels. If they must chat, let them use phone or fax. Ditto for the UN.


      Stop wasting taxpayers' money on these silly summits. And while we're at it, let's fire half the UN's pompous, do-nothing, long-lunching, semi-comatose staff and deport the rest of its zombies to low-rent New Jersey.


      Eric can be reached by e-mail at margolis@foreigncorrespondent.com


      World Fact Book (CIA)]


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