WordType Designs
Driven To Distractions©
The Sound of One Hand Clapping©


A rchive Date
[ 26-12-2004 ]
Category
[ International Relations ]
sub-Categoy
[ Mass Media ]

      [http://www.canoe.ca/Columnists/gillespie.html

      Scantily clad 'ambassadors' share common thread
      By Ian Gillespie - Free Press News Columnist
      May 31, 2002

      Miss South Africa slinks across the stage in a bathing suit that leaves little room for anything, including one's imagination. She has one hand on her hip and a provocative pout on her face. The audience applauds wildly and the judges' score flashes across the screen.

      Minutes later, the TV commentator says personality and intelligence are important to winning the Miss Universe pageant. "
      But if you happen to look marvelous in a swimsuit - hey, nobody's going to argue with that," chirps the cohost.

      It's Wednesday evening and CBS is broadcasting the 51st Miss Universe contest from San Juan, Puerto Rico. Organizers estimate 600 million people in 176 countries are watching the event.


      It's an evening of glitzy entertainment, with flashing lights, billowing smoke and pounding music. Organizers say the Miss Universe pageant is focused on more than looks. They regard the contest as an aid to global understanding. Miss Israel, for instance, said she was doing Israeli women a service by taking their minds off the Mideast conflict. She would not, however, pose beside Miss Egypt for photographs.


      The Miss Universe panel of 10 judges includes former Baywatch TV star Gena Lee Nolin and Survivor: Africa champion Ethan Zohn. The winner receives makeup and clothes, a luxurious New York apartment, a year's salary and two years' tuition to the School of Film and Television in New York.

      After the parade of contestants in swimsuits and evening gowns, and following TV clips about the entrant's rigorous preparation ("I train all parts of my body," says Miss Canada, who seems warm and friendly), the 10 finalists are interviewed. The final question is: "What makes you blush?"


      To the roars of a raucous crowd, the beautiful Miss Russia - whose real name is, I think, Oxana, although I may have confused her with Miss Venezuela - answers, "When I say the wrong things!" Miss Russia wins the crown.


      Later that night over at the newly opened Legends club on Piccadilly Street, Miss Chrissie slinks across the stage in high heels and black leather. She has one hand on her hip and a provocative pout on her face. Some audience members half-heartedly applaud. One man near the stage seems to be sleeping. "C'mon now, show your appreciation," says the announcer.


      The Legends' parking lot is jammed and there are more than 100 patrons in the bar. It's an evening of glitzy entertainment, with flashing lights, billowing smoke and pounding music. Owner Dan Charnicovsky emphasizes Legends isn't a strip club. He calls it "a gentleman's club."


      There is no official panel of judges, although patrons often show satisfaction with crumpled bills. There are no formal interview questions at Legends. The women, however, often pose their own queries. "Do you want some cheering up?" asks one woman, her arm around my neck.


      "Would you like some company?" asks another, cupping my hand in hers.


      I'm told there is a private "gentleman's lounge" where I can get better acquainted with the performers. I decline, although the women all seem warm and friendly. Strictly speaking, there's no talent category. There are, however, rigorous spins, twirls and scissor-like manoeuvres.


      At one point, a gentleman clambers onto the stage and lies on his back with a rolled-up five dollar bill protruding from his lips.


      The beautiful woman - I think her name is Christiana, but I might've confused her with Chrissie - snatches the bill from the man's mouth. She accomplishes this without using her hands.


      "Now that's what I call in-your-face entertainment," says the announcer.


      Yesterday, the New York Times reported that Miss Panama, who was first-runner up in the Miss Universe pageant, wants to be an environmental engineer and Miss Russia wants to practise law.


      I neglected to ask Chrissie about her aspirations. But if I had, I don't think she'd have said anything about world peace.



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